So are you done?

That's the question we get asked the most- after people ask how Temesgen's adjusting.  The short answer I give to almost everyone is, "Shane says the van is full."  And that's mostly true (well, the van being full is really true- only have a 7 passenger minivan:)).  I look at my 5 little ducklings as they follow me through a store or back to the car after school and it looks like we are pretty full.  Having 5 boys all close in age can be busy- they all want to play soccer so that means tons of soccer practices and games to plan around which can interrupt my much-loved family dinner time.  But they really do all love playing and it's only for a 10 week season (we're not a traveling sport family:)).  Trying to get homework done with 5 different kids- one of whom has only been speaking English for not quite 3 months- can make for some crazy after school times (some of this spent at the soccer fields which is harder to make little boys focus during!).  There's the expense of 5 kids- doesn't matter if children are biological or adopted- raising kids can be expensive (and we're 'cheap' compared to lots of other families).  Food alone for this brood is intimidating!!!  So the longer answer is, "Yes, I think we're done."
Notice I don't use the words "for sure"- I use "I think".  I do feel pretty complete with our family.  I love our family- I love our boys- I love the beautiful color in our family.  And 5 kids is a lot!:)  BUT- I can't use words like "for sure" or "I would never..." because that's like putting out a challenge to God- asking Him to show me again how much He's taught me in these last 3 1/2 years (starting with when I went on the mission trip to Kenya) and seeing if He needs to show me in new ways what He can accomplish through me.  3 years ago, we were DONE having children (especially Shane).  We had 2 boys- who needs more than 2 kids??:)  Adoption wasn't even on our radar.  All is took was for God to get ahold of our hearts and literally weeks later, we signed on with our agency and 6 months later, had Kalid and Abuzaid home with us.  When He wants us to move- He wants us to MOVE!:)

And then, when we were settled into our happy little lives as a family of 6, even settled into a much larger home (thank you, God!), He got ahold of our hearts again.  There was a 9 year old boy who had been waiting with his 2 best friends for 18 months.  No one would step forward- no one wanted to say yes to him.  But he had people praying for him (including us!!)- praying that a family would step up and bring him into their family.  We were DONE (again)- who needs more than 4 kids??  But we could pray- that was something we could do (and I do believe in the power of prayer!). 
BUT-  God had other plans for our family and that definitely, without question, included adding Temesgen to our family.

Our boys (and Shane and I!) have learned so much about God's heart as we've gone through this process twice.  We've seen generosity that would astound most people.  We've seen Him work in the details- times I thought things were moving so slowly and we should've been to court already, but then, in the end, we got the same court date as we had with Kalid and Abuzaid.  That is a detail that is just awesome.  I've seen my biological boys' hearts be completely opened to loving brothers who are not biologically related to them (and my adopted boys' hearts be open in return).  I've seen my boys' worlds open up as they traveled to Ethiopia and got to see first hand where 3 of their brothers lived- see and appreciate and love the culture and country where they're from.  My faith has grown so much in the last 3 years.  It's changed from a more surface-y faith to a strong, deep faith that can only grow when it's tested and going through the adoption process twice has tested it for certain!  We've seen the ripple effect of our decision to adopt- whether that means other people have adopted or started the process or they're stepped out in faith in some other way. 

You can kind of get used to living out your faith in this way- it feels pretty amazing to feel like you're living where God truly wants you to be and doing what He wants you to do.  You can also get used to starting the crazy process of adoption, praying continually for months for a child who is half way around the world and paperwork and governments are in the way, and then traveling to bring them home.  You can get used to going to Ethiopia because it's awesome and I would love to go there as often as I can.

For right now, though, we have 5 kids that we're focusing on.  Temesgen is doing great and he seems to be thriving.  But we want to be sure he's all good for now.  We want to focus on getting him caught up academically which is a big job with a 10 year old.  We want to be able to afford to feed the ones we have and let them do a season of sports if they want to (because they're all competitive and athletic).  But we also want to feel like we're following the life God has for us.  So that means praying about what's next.  We are content with where we are right now.  I'm not feeling that gnawing feeling like I'm supposed to be doing something else right now.  But I'm continually praying that I won't miss what He has for me and for our family.  I don't want to get comfortable and live an inward focused life.  I want to seek Him with my whole heart and be ready when he says, "MOVE!"  I know it's coming- I don't know what it will be next time.  I can't say it would be adoption for sure.  There are so many ways, both here and abroad, where He can use us.  You just have to be ready and willing to go when it's time.  I'm so thankful I said "yes" to going to Kenya, "yes" to adopting the first time, and "yes" to adopting the second time.  Those are the big things in my life, but I've said "yes" to other opportunities as well and have felt blessed by the chance to serve.  You just never know what He has for your life.  If you would've told me even 4 years ago what my life would look like now, I wouldn't have believed you.  You can't put parameters around God- He's in the business of making miracles out of people's lives for His glory and I'm just along for the ride!